Sympathy Sentiments

If a friend of family member has just lost a pet, it s natural to want to send them a sympathy gift. The hard part isn t pulling out your credit card to buy though it s deciding what to send. It s a sensitive time and you don t want to upset someone who s close to you. That s why we re here. We ve been on both sides of this terrible time and can guide you in terms of what to send.

If you have a tight budget, for less than $50 you can get the following items:

- A book that helps the pet owner through their grieving. – A memorial stone for the backyard, engraved with the pet s name, date of birth or a nice poem. – A figurine of the pet s breed is always nice. – A necklace with a bone or a dog pendant. – A picture frame and put a picture of the pet in it.

If you have a little more to play with, for under $100 you could get:

- A granite pet marker with the text of your choice. – A portrait frame urn for a keepsake or cremains. – A memorial stone with a beautiful saying: If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I d walk right up to Heaven and bring you Home again

If money is not the issue, and you don t mind going over $100, you might like:

- A Rock Urn. Urns don t necessarily have to hold ashes; this beautiful rock urn that is designed to withstand the weather could hold a favorite toy instead, or whatever your friend would like. – A River Rock memorial, engravable with 2-4 lines of text. These are just gorgeous and perfect for the garden. – If you have picture of the pet, consider an artistic rendition (quite realistic) on an ostrich or emu egg. It s breathtaking, I can assure you.

I hope this has given you some ideas, and that the grieving pet owner in your life enjoys your sympathy gift. To buy any of the products mentioned, please visit our Pet Loss Gifts & Cards page.(www.pet-memorials-info.com/pet-loss-gifts.htm)

Becvar, D. S. (2001). In the presence of grief: Helping family members resolve death, dying, and bereavement issues. New York: Guilford.

There are many books that give us theoretical and clinical information that may prove useful and, in some cases, invaluable to our practices. There are also many books that touch us emotionally because the author bridges the gap between the pages and our minds with wisdom and inspiration. There are few books, however, that manage to do both effectively. Dorothy Becvar has thankfully managed this feat as she gives a gift in the form of this book on working with issues surrounding death.

The primary premise of the book is that it is not possible, nor even desirable to “get over” the loss of close relationships. Instead, Becvar points us toward an idea of embracing grief as a companion that accompanies us through a complex of journey of healing. Most literature in the grief field is aimed at moving people to a point of adaptation. Becvar does this also, but with the unique twist of learning the lessons of grief so life can eventually become joyful and full of wisdom.

In part one, “The contexts of grief,” the book begins with an overview of death, dying, and bereavement issues. Although this review may be ground already covered for the experienced clinician, the summary of both clinical and research findings are both complete and precise. This overview would be invaluable to those who are new to the clinical work on grief. Becvar then proceeds to present the different scenarios in which death occurs, such as unexpected death, death of a child, death of a spouse, and death of a parent. These chapters make up the bulk of the book. In part two, “Grief in the context of therapy,” we are given three chapters on specific issues that clients are likely to encounter in moving through the grief experience in therapy. These chapters focus on funerals and other rituals, finding meaning in the grief process, and reclaiming joy along with the sorrow of grief.